The Goal is to be Successful, Not Stressful

After listening to a TED Talks podcast today, I became very inspired to talk about something that is near and dear to my heart. Lets discuss goals and motivation. Sure many people have goals, and many people are successful at meeting these goals. I really believe the real struggle begins the time you meet the goals. The idea of meeting the goals but keeping motivated to strive for other, more extensive goals is the thing that is really arduous. For me, the goals were ones that took a lot of time, and patience to meet, and when I finally met them I was on top of the world. The real reason I believe, is the change you see in yourself, or others when you are successfully meeting said goals.

First and foremost, a lot can be said for someone that sets goals, and stays motivated long enough to see results. Really a struggle in this part of goal making is actually seeing progress. For some it could be decreasing sugar, or increasing water. Small goals ultimately will help you achieve larger goals. You can read countless books for motivation, self help and a variety of "How to Become a Better Person" books, but it is really how you plan and achieve moderate goals that really help you succeed. 

Set small goals, and work towards them. Let these goals work for you. Believe it or not, the 2015 photo was when I already lost 30 lbs. 

I am no self help guru, but I can speak from experience. After numerous times I failed at achieving simple goals, I found myself punishing my ability to achieve anything. Really looking back in hindsight, people that are unsuccessful with their goals usually have a legitimate reason. Not because they are lazy or unmotivated, but because they don't know how to reach the goals they've set for themselves. It is important that you set goals for yourself that are obtainable. A person trying to get into better shape can't just jump into the life of fitness everyday, ultimately you will burn yourself out. I would suggest to this person, set a goal of going twice a week the first couple months. Start off where you feel comfortable, and gradually increase your frequency. You will begin to feel better, and in turn increase the amount you go thus turning these goals into achievements.   

Where do you begin when you are trying to set small goals? You must think of a bigger picture, then see what small goals you can set to obtain your larger goal. However, the most important part of goal setting is to make sure you set realistic goals. Realistic, and simple is the key to getting started on a journey to better yourself. I know you're thinking, "yeah realistic, simple, what does this even mean"? Setting realistic and simple goals can be something that you set for yourself that you know you will easily achieve. For example, I am notorious for major sugar cravings at night, so I will bring some chocolate with me to bed. Well, after months of doing this, I have noticed that I am not physically where I want to be. I am not in a bad place, but lets be real, the chocolate is not conductive to a healthy lifestyle. So with that being said, I told myself I needed to do something about this. For me, cold turkey doesn't work, I feel like I am depriving myself of things that I want. It will only make "quitting the chocolate" more difficult. 

I decided that in order for me to be successful, I needed to make sure everyone was on the same page as me. Honestly, this was the hardest part, because for me, if it is in the house I will find it and I will eat it. I needed to make sure that I was not being tempted, but I also can't ask others to remove things from their lives on my account. So I very politely asked if they wouldn't mind keeping it some place I could't reach or get to. In my eyes if it is out of sight, it is out of mind. Well I am telling you that doesn't work. One night I was on the prowl for it, I swear women have a sixth sense when it comes to chocolate especially during the time of the month. 

So for that instant, I gave in and ate the whole damn box of Junior Mints. I was ashamed, and more importantly, I was torn down as a person. How could I have been so successful in losing 116 lbs, but can't keep my hands off the chocolate? I needed to re-evaluate my approach to this whole goal setting thing. Instead of just removing it from my life completely, I limited myself. I allowed myself to indulge in a very small piece of chocolate to take the edge off my nerves so I didn't feel like I was depriving myself. Another tactic that I used and worked for me is keeping unsweetened apple sauce in the house. I know it sounds boring, but I am telling you that if you add a little bit of cinnamon it becomes a killer treat. I like to reward myself with apple sauce, a banana with peanut butter, or anything that is nutrient dense. Natural sugars are the best sugars, and don't ever be ashamed to eat them.   

The goal is to be successful, not stressful. Furthermore, the reason I tell this specific story is because you can set goals that you know helped you be successful prior. However, you are allowed to give in, you are allowed to fail, because that is what helps you realize that you are human and we as humans crave for things. 

After I decided to switch my goal setting, I realized that I cannot be successful if I approach it in a way that will ultimately fail me. I needed to sit back and reevaluate my goal, and find an approach that works for me. The best approach in this situation was allowing myself a treat, but knowing when to stop. The moment you begin to see progress in your goals, the more likely you are to stay on track. After you begin to notice that you can bring less chocolate to bed, or your range of motion gets more advanced, you begin to push yourself to be better at the goal you've set.         

For me, I have noticed when I set little goals, I tend to stick with them until they become a routine. You should never set goals that you don't plan on continually work for every day following reaching your goal. A new goal I am working on and will begin this week is the amount of water I drink. I will be the first to admit that I am not anywhere close to what I should be consuming every day. I'd say I can maybe drink 16.9 ounces in one day. Which by any standards is too little. On top of the minimal amount of water I drink, I sweat out a ton at the gym daily. The goal I set for myself is to  drink 2 liters a day. Coming from drinking 16.9 in one day I will start off the way that will help me be successful, because lets face it, I just simply cannot drink 2 liters right now. So for me to reach the goal, I need to start off somewhere realistic. Beginning at what I drink now and gradually adding more water throughout the week. That might not sound like much, but to me, it is obtainable but I still need to work for it. I think this is a reasonable mini goal I set for myself, because it is something I will have to actively work for, but not let it consume my day. Read my mini plan below.

Here is the plan:

End Goal - Get 2 liters of water in my body in a 24 hour period (end time: April 6, 2018). I am giving myself a reasonable time to complete this goal.

- Feb 21 - March 7 begin my water increase. For two weeks from Feb. 21 - March 7 I will actively drink 2 16.9 ounce bottles per day. That totals for 33.8 ounces or 1 liter.  

- March 8 - March 22 begin increasing to 3 16.9 ounces in one day. Two weeks I will drink 3 bottles of water or 50.7 ounces per day. I need to make sure my body acclimates to this change, I know I'll be running to the potty more frequently. 

- March 23 - April 6 Add on the last 16.9 bottle of water totaling 67.6 ounces, or 2 total liters. I want to maintain this amount forever, or attempt to get at least 1.5 liters in a day hereafter. So it is important that I am able to keep in mind the positive effects it has on my body and mind. 

This is just a small goal that I have set for myself that I know can be obtained. I feel as if the only goals that are met are the ones we know are realistic. I wont allow myself to be burdened by goals that I know I cannot meet. For example, I wouldn't set a goal for myself to run a marathon in 2 months after not running in awhile. I mean it's possibly obtainable, but not realistic and I would kill myself for trying to make this goal.  

Finally, as I end this little thought, I want to make sure I remind you and myself everyday that goals are small and goals are meant to be difficult but not back breaking. If I don't obtain the goal, then I pick myself up and try it again. Set new dates, new times anything to help keep the motivation I already have constant. Never beat yourself up for something you are trying, it is after all a trial and you are allowed to fail. There will never be any growth if you never try in the first place. Until next time.

Lyndsey