2017 - THE END

There has been a lot going on in my life, I am finally able to sit down and write about it. So I am not sure where to start...

First thing, I am still on my fitness journey, this will always be a struggle for me. Being someone that is addicted to food for so long it has been a hard uphill struggle to implement healthy habits. For so long we have decided to reward ourselves with food, that even today, I tell myself "Oh self you had a great workout today, reward yourself with chocolate"...Of course that is a bad habit, but old habits die hard. I will always have to work on this as my life for so many years revolved around food.

I have FINALLY finished school. I am so ecstatic, for 4 years I have struggled with the fact that I was working towards something that might mean nothing to some. Tori graduated last year, and now it is my turn. However, I feel like I have the graduation blues. The only way I can explain it is to compare it to running blues. For example, if you are training for a marathon or half in my case, and you work everyday with your run, diet, and cadence you struggle to get better every day. You eat, sleep and breath your training so you can set your very own PR. The day of the race comes, you have carb loaded, stretched, drank plenty of water, never forget your mustard packets (like that actually works) you run your marathon and boom you're finished. You hit your PR, and you are so happy. You feel like a million bucks.... Well after that run some runners experience a runners depression. Or running blues. You basically trained for something and spent your life for the past several months doing the same thing every day and now you're done. You have nothing to look forward to. Basically, you go into a depression because your mind is telling you that you've completed your goal and you have nothing to look forward to. Essentially, you can fix this by possibly training for another run, or joining a run club. But how do you fix this for school? Do you just go back and get your next degree? Do you climb more into debt? I feel as if education is a scam.... Now wait wait wait, what I mean by this is I feel like you work so hard and spend so much money, to only gain a piece of paper.

You work so hard to obtain things, and when the high of the actual achievement comes, you plummet into depression. It is as if you work so hard, to get nowhere. I might have a different feeling about it if it didn't cost so much. I might feel differently if, I was actually compensated more for that little piece of paper I worked so hard for. Regardless of the way I feel now, I am forced to either "shit or get off the pot" with regards to my education. Do I want to go back, or should I be complacent with what I have?

Thanksgiving is going to come up really fast... Like really fast. The holidays are gone, then they return with a vengeance. If by chance there is a way to catch up from last year, there is no way that you will stay caught up for long. I am curious to know who decided that the holidays were required to be so expensive? I feel like people care more about gifts, and how to impress others, that the forget what the holidays should be about. Not to sound preachy, but come on guys. The holidays are not so much about what you get but how you spend them. I know that sounds so cliche, so I wont spend too much time on it. But it is truly how I feel, the people  have become so showy with what they have that it ruins it for everyone.

Finally, I'd say that this coming year I am hoping to have some new changes. I have applied for a new job within the university, with the Anatomy department. I feel like this is a really great opportunity to grow here, and finally get me to the Willed Bodies program. That would be my ultimate goal here. If I decide to stay. This of course will lead to another blog post. But I have to tell you, I have looked at universities in New York!!! Crazy, to think that I would uproot my entire life to move somewhere that would flip my world upside down... When I complete another blog I will have to touch on this topic. For now, I will just say... New York was magical. No place I have ever been has touched me so deeply. However, is it enough to change my life completely, and move from all friends and family I have ever had? We will see, and we will see what Alex has in store for me this year. Until next time friends.... Good luck and good night!